Wednesday, January 11, 2012

NEVER give me a pain pill.

I had a tooth pulled yesterday morning and didn't pick up my prescription pain meds. By the time hubby got home from work and fed me my mashed potatoes & gravy, I was in pain. He had picked up my pain meds and he gave me one--Lortab.

I got up and read facebook and even posted that I was starting to feel a little dizzy, but it wasn't a major dizzy. I just knew I probably needed to go to bed soon.........


.........I got up to go to the kitchen for something and had to sit down at the table. Hubby was washing dishes and we were talking when suddenly (and I mean BAM like a slap in the face, totally unexpected) I had severe anxiety, felt like I couldn't breath and that my heart was racing and I broke out in a cold sweat.....

....I remember slumping down in the chair because I felt like I couldn't even sit up right. Then things were spinning like faster than being on a tilt-a-whirl. I couldn't see. I knew I was going to pass out.......

Hubby later told me that I was looking around like crazy and that he was patting me on the cheek and holding my head upright and saying "Are you ok? Are you ok?" I don't remember that at all.

I threw up too.... and that is just something I don't do. Even through 3 pregnancies and morning sickness and everything I didn't vomit. I've thrown up maybe 10 times in my life. TMI, I know...


He said he was going to help me get to the bed and I think I stood up, leaning over on him and he was going to try to walk me at least to the couch in the next room..........

‎........but I passed out. (The only other time in my life I have passed out was when I was a kid and I fractured my arm)

...I passed out and I'm sure my hubby was glad I'd lost 46 pounds as he helped me down to the ground LOL I'm still too heavy for him to just pick up and carry to the couch but he did get me down to the ground without injuring myself

...so I didn't remember even standing up but it was like I was asleep and I woke up on the kitchen floor in my hubby's arms and my kids all in my face scared.....

he wanted to get me to the bed but I knew I should not stand up so he helped me CRAWL (so messed up I had to have help crawling! that is sad!) to the bed and he told me to NOT get out of bed without telling him!

.....and I slept like a rock. This morning I'm still weak and a bit dizzy...I'm taking it slow. But it is nothing compared to yesterday! wow! I don't plan to EVER take another pill like that one!

I'll be glad for this pill to be completely out of my system. Tomorrow night we have our TOPS walk.

I looked it up online and I had all the symptoms of an overdose--but I only took one pill.

wow.

Saturday, January 7, 2012

run your OWN race

January 6, 2012,My 3 miles at the track took me 1 hour and 3 minutes (that's longer than last time *sad face*)...for 2 reasons: #1 I haven't walked at the track in a long time and even though I've been doing the Leslie Sansone walk at home dvd, it isn't the same. So, I'm out of practice. (Let this be a good reminder to be consistent with track walking when the weather allows). Reason #2 is because there were other people there walking and I started out too quickly, trying to make myself look more fit than I am (run your OWN race, silly girl, not someone else's)and then at the 3/4 mile mark, my calves totally cramped up on me and I had to sit on the bleachers a LONG time. I started to go home. It hurt! So, that's why my time is so bad today.

Until those plans come....

Several people asked what I was going to do until tax time, when I plan to do the once-per-week gym thing. I will keep doing what I do now---which is make sure I get in 45 minutes of exercise, 6 days per week. Usually, that is in the form of a Leslie Sansone dvd. Once in a blue moon, when the weather is nice, I load up the kids and go to the track.

I also want to say "hello!" and "welcome" to my new followers! It is nice to be read :)

Friday, January 6, 2012

ah ha plans.

Out of the blue, I had an "ah ha!" idea and I'm really looking forward to it.

The issues:
Since I homeschool, I am with my kids ALL THE TIME and I could really use "me time" on a regular basis. Mom used to watch the kids every week while I went to TOPS but the kids started going with me when I started my own chapter.

I love exercising on a treadmill but I can't justify (or afford) $45 per month when I can't even go because...............like I said, I always have my kids and I rarely have ME time.

I want to watch the Biggest Loser but we don't have cable or anything.

The "ah ha" solution:
Ask mom to commit to watching the kids every week when The Biggest Loser is on, and go to the gym, buy a day pass ($5) and walk/jog on the treadmill while watching the show on the tv's that are built in to the treadmill!

Oh yes.......

I ran it past hubby and we are going to wait until tax time (how sad that you have to wait until tax time to free up a measley $5, but anyway).... but effective about 6 weeks from now, that should be the plan.

I'm looking forward to it!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

7 things every day

1. Eat within calorie range, always.

2. Exercise at least 45 minutes every day except Wednesdays.

3. Drink 132 oz or more of water every day.

4. Have at least 5 fruits/veggies daily.

5. Every night, text my numbers to my accountability friend.

6. Don't even think about going to bed until the next day's food has been planned.

7. Set out tomorrow's clothes before I go to bed. (huge time saver for me)


So there you have it, my New Year's resolutions :) So far, so good.

Wouldn't it be awesome to NEVER have a gain in 2012? I'm going to strive for that.

We had an awesome TOPS meeting last night.

I have been incredibly busy.

Rock this day, okay? ;) ttyl

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

All quarter in the black. :)

Last night was the last weigh-in of the year. I lost half a pound. This whole quarter (Sept-Dec) I have been in the black--losing 12 weeks and staying the same 1 week. It resulted in a 17 pound loss. I am very happy with that. I will get an award at the next area fun day and as vain as it sounds, I love recognition. :)

Monday, December 19, 2011

It's not a gift.

For 12 solid weeks, I lost weight. I rocked it. It really wasn't hard. I had my mindset correct. I liked to feel the energy I received from exercise. My stomach turned at the thought of artificial ingredients, fake food, white bread, etc. It was easy. My weight loss felt like a gift. I just felt blessed and all pulled together. I wasn't struggling. at all.

IT IS NOT A GIFT.

A gift is something you get just because. Weight loss isn't just randomly handed to you with a Merry Christmas. Weight loss only comes because of something your are DOING. works.

I had this mentality of "oh yeah, I've got this. I'm losing weight and I can not fail.". That is a bad way to think! My weight loss mentor (whom I text every night) is in the midst of a long term family emergency and I'm not texting her (...there goes a big accountability thing...uh oh!). Then I got sick (again) with this sinus, cough, low energy stuff and I felt like NOT exercising so I haven't been. (yeah...so much for my "rule" of eating what I planned--- I threw that out way too easily). Throw in the fact that it is a few days before payday, we are broke and there's not a lot of choices in the kitchen. Bad choices are SO easy to justify!!!

JUSTIFYING BAD CHOICES is the exact same thing as MAKING EXCUSES.

Yes, I have been making them.

And so....after 12 weeks of losses, last night I had a turtle (stayed the same).

I need to pull myself together. NOW.


One good choice makes the next good choice easier.... Good choices, here I come.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Grandma doesn't love you just because you eat her cookies

WHY do we waste calories on foods we don't love? I just ate 4-5 coconut oatmeal cookies that weren't even good very good. But grandma made them and brought them to me saying "Merry Christmas" and the next thing you know, I'm eating them. For some reason, my brain said, "You HAVE to eat these! Your sweet grandma made them for you!" UGH! I'm going to brush my teeth and go to bed! Lesson learned: "If you don't love it and if you don't have the calories for it and if isn't good for you, get it OUT OF YOUR HOUSE!"

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

12 in a row

Just a short note to say that YES I did have another loss Monday night (half pound) so I've gone 12 in a row :)

21 things I bet you didn't know about me

1. I am 8 inches taller than my husband.

2. I want to just go to church and not have to serve in any manner and not feel guilty about that. (there is always a shortage of workers, be it Sunday School teachers, church cleaners, people willing to be the treasurer, etc)

3. I love ice cream, especially mocha.

4. I haven't cut my hair since 1993.

5. Facial hair is a constant battle. *sigh*

6. I stay on facebook way too much.

7. I dream of having everything clean and perfectly organized but I never have time to do it all (see #6 again).

8. I'd love to go to a fancy hotel, all by myself, work out in their gym, go to a spa and get a facial and get my facial hair taken care of (see #5 again LOL), then go back to my room and watch the Biggest Loser and get a lot of sleep. Not that I'd ever be able to do that without feeling like I'm neglecting my sleep, but I do daydream of that LOL

9. We go to the library EVERY Monday.

10. I check out 3 health magazines from the library every week.

11. We check out an average of 30 books PER WEEK. My kids read A LOT.

12. I think I will have a job doing public speaking of some sort one day way down the road.

13. I measure honey with a medicine cup.

14. I love tights.

15. I CRAVE pancakes with Griffin's syrup but since that syrup is 500 CALORIES for a half cup, I no longer buy it.

16. I quit school at age 15 (which is illegal).

17. I miscarried in 2004.

18. I drink my water from a 44 ounce Sonic cup.

19. I make lists. Every day. And I feel like a failure when I don't accomplish everything on my list. (can anyone say ocd?)

20. I have an emotional need for words of affirmation. (This is not always a good thing)

21. When I become the TOPS Queen, I plan to ride on the back of a convertible and wave at people in parades. :)


I was tagged by Jessica at "See How She Runs".

I don't know how to link people's pages, but I'm tagging:

Jane Cartelli at keepingthepoundsoff.com
Carb Tripper (Anne H)
Dawn (Lay down my idols)

Monday, December 12, 2011

flop

Guess what? December is busy! and NOT NORMAL! LOL

Even though I believed I had a rock solid determination, I had TWO flop days this past week. Flop day number one I didn't exercise because I was busy, busy, busy and by 10 p.m. I was too tired. I also ate a kashi mocha bar even when I had used all of my calories. Ok, that wasn't a HUGE flop but it wasn't on target either!

Flop day #2 was Saturday. I started my day with my kashi cereal and later had some fruit, so I didn't just wake up planning to fail. However, Saturday was crazy busy! (4 hours of shopping, cleaned the church, went to a parade, constant something!) When I stopped by my parent's, my dad gave me a donut. I ate it. (mistake!) I was hungry for junk from that point on. While cleaning the church, there were Christmas cookies in the kitchen. I ate one. Supper was a happy meal. *sigh* I ate candy from the parade and then went home and ate cereal and a pb&j sandwich at approx 10:30 p.m. and go NO exercise in! FAIL!

And so, I made new rules for myself and I hate them but they help! #1 I must get up at 6 a.m. and get my exercise DONE first. (I am SO not a morning person...waaa!) Rule #2 Each night before I go to bed, I must write down exactly what I will be eating the next day and then stick to it. If someone gives me something yummy, I can take it home and work it into the next day's food plan. NO IMPULSE EATING.

yep. December is not easy. But I refuse to fail.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

rest vs. exercise

I normally only allow myself one day per week that I don't exercise-- Wednesdays--because Wednesdays are hectic for me with school, daughter's therapy and then church.

However, this week has been busy busy busy busy. I've been to the dentist twice this week. I've had more errands and paperwork to take care of than normal, along with my normal busyness.

I am so tired.

I know that being excessively tired is not healthy. I WANT to finish up what has to be done tonight and go to bed super early (I'm thinking 8).

But on the other hand............I don't want to be making excuses to miss my workout.

tired tired tired.

What to do?

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Rocking it.

I'm still rocking it :) Last night was week number 11 of losses. 19 pounds gone in 11 weeks. I'm 44 pounds from my highest weight ever. Yes.

I have a super busy day today:
school, errands, dentist, Christmas shopping.

No time to blog or read other's blogs! I will catch up soon!

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

banana


*Step away from the banana and no one gets hurt*

I eat a banana every morning in my kashi cereal, so I felt nervous when I realized we were down to my last banana. I'm not taking my chances on it being gone tomorrow--I claimed it LOL

Today I ate 100% healthy and on plan and had a very high energy day. I need to do that EVERY day. It is so much better than the junk food/feel bad days.

:) goodnight.

Thanks, guys :)

Thank you all for the comments you have left the me past couple of days. They really are encouraging and helpful!

Yesterday I wrote out exactly what I will eat today. It is healthy and balanced and I will stick to it. Today I will write out tomorrow's food. While I'm feeling kind of "wobbley" I think I will do this daily. It takes my emotions out of my eating.

I'm planning to have a rocking great day. I hope you do too!!!!!!

Thanks again!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

NO. Just no.

I have really been on a roll, you know. Eating healthy and not even craving junk. Exercising and enjoying it. Feeling energetic. Losing weight.

Then I allowed myself to eat too much pie on Thanksgiving and while my weight is ok, my cravings and energy level are NOT. I have craved sweets and carbs and artificial junk that isn't really even food. I need to watch another food documentary and get repulsed at that kind of food again.

Eating pie on one day (Thanksgiving) got me out of the groove that I was in and I'm like a zipper that is out of whack and doesn't want to zip right.

NO. JUST NO. I will NOT allow myself to stay out of whack. NO>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>. no.

I've had a headache for days. I have had no energy, wanted to sleep, sleep and sleep, and have felt sick. I have eaten cookies and white bread and a fake burger from McDonalds. I haven't gone over my calories (because I have to report my calories ever night and I don't want to look like a flop) but I reach the end of my calories before I reach the end of my day and I go to bed hungry. Right now it is 2:15 p.m., I am hungry and I have 500 something calories left for the rest of the day. wow.

Ok, that's enough bellyaching.

Now, to come up with a plan. Because I refuse to stay here. You lose weight when you are giving it ALL YOU HAVE and you start to regain it when you fail to give it all you have. I need a plan. A get-back-into-the-groove plan.

All I know is to do the things I know to do. Eat fruits, veggies, chicken. Nothing fake. Eat normal portions. Exercise. Keep reporting to my weight loss mentor each night. Drink water. Think positive thoughts. Do it regardless of how I feel or what I crave or what sounds better.

Just do it.

Because I refuse to go back to the old me. NO. THe answer is just no and that is final.

Yes, I've been talking to myself here. :)

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

waaaa

Today is a day that if I didn't have kids and responsibilities, I would just stay in bed. If I get to feeling much worse, I may just stay in bed anyway. I just don't feel well! waaaaa!

But I had a couple of updates to make:

Last night I lost a measly 0.25 pounds and I barely lost that. Thanksgiving was the only day that I didn't count calories but I guess I overdid it enough on that one day to mess up the whole week. I have struggled all week trying to get my weight back down so that I would have a loss last night. So, 0.25 pounds.... 10th week of losses in a row. That makes 17 pounds in 10 weeks and 42 pounds from my highest weight ever. I should be encouraged. But for some reason, I'm not. Probably just because I'm sick. blah.

Also, a TOPS chapter about 3 hours from me asked if I would come speak to them! They would pay for my gas. Since the vehicle I drive can't travel that far, I can't go unless my hubby happens to be off work on the day they want me, so it isn't likely to happen, but still, I was very honored to be asked! I don't really consider myself a speaker.

.............I hear someone in the bathroom........that means one of my monkeys are up and I need to improve my mood and be a good mom. *sigh* AND we are just about out of groceries, so I have to get out in the freezing cold and go to the store. *whine, whine*

Thursday, November 24, 2011

5K training reference

This is basically for my own reference, so feel free to ignore it. I want to be able to go back and see progress.

5K times:

Approx 11-18-11, 65 minutes. Jogged the home side bleachers on every lap except the first and last. Stopped once to fix my shoe.

Thanksgiving Day 2011, 55 minutes, 14 seconds. Jogged the visitor's side bleachers on every lap and jogged the home side bleachers on every lap except the first.

January 6, 2012, 1 hour and 3 minutes...for 2 reasons: #1 I haven't walked at the track in a long time and even though I've been doing the Leslie Sansone walk at home dvd, it isn't the same. So, I'm out of practice. (Let this be a good reminder to be consistent with track walking when the weather allows). Reason #2 is because there were other people there walking and I started out too quickly, trying to make myself look more fit than I am (run your OWN race, silly girl, not someone else's)and then at the 3/4 mile mark, my calves totally cramped up on me and I had to sit on the bleachers a LONG time. I started to go home. It hurt! So, that's why my time is so bad today.

March 1, 2012: 52 minutes and 53 seconds @ Shape Fitness (no jogging)

March 22, 2012: 48 minutes and 4 seconds (for 3 miles) or 50 minutes 4 seconds for 3.14 miles. I walked quite a bit at a peppy 4.2 mph and jogged at about 5 mph twice. @Shape Fitness

April 5, 2012: 51 minutes and 23 seconds @ Shape Fitness. I jogged twice but was having bra issues. I walked at 3.7 for the majority of it. Today was Ron's funeral. I didn't really "feel" like walking but I knew I would feel better if I did and I need to take advantage of all the gym times that I can. I also don't need to eat anything else today!

May 9, 2012: 47 minutes, 40 seconds. I was really pushing myself. I got up to 6 mph once. I jogged for about 35 seconds at a time. This was hard.

Nov. 1,2012...46 min, 16 seconds at shape fitness. It was the day of dad's first visit at the cancer center, so I had a lot of emotion in it and pr'd even though I haven't 5K'd in months.

***It's been a long time. I've had a baby. Let's do this AGAIN.****

May 31, 2014 45 minute mark= 2.25 miles. That is all I could do. I hadn't been to the gym in probably over a year.

June 7, 2014 45 minute mark= 2.30 I jogged a bit because I thought I wasn't going to get as good of time as last week.

5K on treadmill= 1hr, 1 min, 38 sec

June 2014 Founder's Day 5K- 53 min, 55 seconds

October 5, 2014- Spirit of Survival (284 pounds) 53 min, 10 sec

DON'T be a glutton today.

Here are some thoughts about the day that I put on facebook:

Gluttony is not going to make this a better holiday. Eat like a normal, healthy person because that is what you are becoming, right? Well then, act like one.

Make your life a story worth telling.

Wake up with determination. Go to bed with satisfaction.

Don't forget to be awesome.

Be your best.

Today can either be tomorrow's regret, or tomorrow's motivation to keep going. You choose.

I would rather say "I did it" than "I gave up".

When you have *changed your lifestyle*, you DON'T just "take a day off" from that. Do you choose to stay changed today? I DO.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Belly button

My belly button is changing. Did yours as you lost weight? It's just a random thing I thought of and thought I'd ask. LOL

Last night we had a church Thanksgiving dessert party. (why do all parties have to revolve around food??) I visited with friends and ate two KASHI GRANOLA BARS while my friends and family ate pies and cookies. :) A lady in our church told me that I was looking smaller and healthier and that really made my night. :)