sandpaper stuff

Good grief, some days are filled with things that leave me feeling like my emotions have been rubbed raw with sandpaper. I'm so tired, both physically and emotionally. Thankfully though, I am in my calorie range and I did will nutritionally, despite the stress.

Do you read Sean Anderson's blog? His post tonight inspired me to sit at the computer and just write for 5 minutes. Days like today, I need to just get it out and tell about the chaos.

Busy has been an understatement. It is SO frustrating to be so busy (and baby on top of it all) that you can't fit in 15 minutes of exercise........and if that sounds like an excuse, it isn't.........because I didn't fit in a shower either and you would think that would have been do-able.

Anyway.......we dealt today with soonercare not wanting to pay for any more pain meds for dad because he has reached his limit. Their limit is 12 pain rx's per year. Hello.........my dad is a terminal cancer patient. He is SO sick. THere is a way we can ask them to pay for it, involving some paperwork that we will be filling out. But in the meantime, the cash cost is about $80 for a 15 day supply. We don't have that kind of money.

Today someone that I love made me feel like a loser. I won't go into details, but the person and I have totally different opinions about something and they just won't let it go. Especially at this time, so exhausted, so emotional,.........it is hurtful that they imply that I need to do something concerning my dad that I simply can not do. I can do my best and no more. I know that is vague, but, anyway....... Just a hurtful day.

Tomorrow hubby will watch the baby and older kids while I go to the doctor for my postpartum checkup. I will also pick up money I'm borrowing to get dad's meds and then go by and get them and take them to him. I hope the whole thing (dr, money, pharmacy) goes VERY quickly because I would REALLY like to feel I have spare time to go exercise alone. I think it would do me a lot of good. But we have church that evening and getting everyone ready takes a while, so I can't be gone too terribly long. ANyway....hope I have plenty of time.

Oh.......speaking of the postpartum visit, they have called about THREE times in the past 5 weeks to ask what I'm using for birth control. That is so personal. AND I'm not going to talk about that right in front of my 12 year old. They called again today to remind me of tomorrow's appointment and wanted me to call them back and let them know (again) what kind of birth control I'm using. I didn't return their call. After tomorrow's appointment, if they call me again, I think I'm going to give them a little heads-up about courtesy.

Wow...that was more than 5 minutes. Thanks for reading. Goodnight!