(Trust me, this is about food. Don't let the first paragraph scare you off.)
There is a story in the old testament about a man who was crazy in love with this girl he couldn't have. I think she was his step-sister or something. Verse after verse tells about how much he craved her and how lovesick he was. Until one day, he decided he WAS going to have her. He had built the experience up in his mind until he could stand it no longer. He took her, the woman he loved, and raped her...and it wasn't like he thought it would be....and after that, he hated her.
I have a similar experience with Jello No Bake Peanut Butter Dessert (and many, many others over the years, but the Jello No Bake is today's story.) I had eaten it before (I will call it JNBPBD for short LOL), like a couple of years ago and it was good. Then my mixer broke. You MUST use a mixer in the assembling of the JNBPBD. So, for a couple of years, I built it up in my mind and thought about how WONDERFUL the JNBPBD was!!! I was lusting after it!
When dad asked what I'd like for Christmas, I said I wanted a new mixer. Now, I had survived TWO YEARS without a mixer. I can't think of anything I need a mixer for besides JNBPBD.
Dad bought the mixer, I made the dessert. I ate some. I was disappointed. It wasn't like I had "remembered" it. "Remembered" aka built up some fantasy in my mind.
Maybe it was just a faulty piece. So, I tried another. Nope. Maybe one from the middle was just right. No.
I ended up eating the whole thing (over the course of two days, but still!!!) with the exception of maybe 3 servings, which my husband and daughter ate.
I felt like the man who raped his step-sister. I felt cheated. I was ashamed of what I had done. I had been lied to and the person who lied to me, was me.
Can you relate? Is it not true? Our brains make up crazy "memories" of foods from our past that were AMAZINGLY AWESOME, and yet, we can't recreate that experience.
I'm thinking the reason we can't recreate it is because it wasn't there to begin with. We are just letting ourselves lie to ourselves.
`thinking aloud
Oh me, I laughed until I cried. Then I read this to my husband and laughed again :) And I totally relate :)
ReplyDeletemmmm it got me thinking…and I laughed then realised yep I can relate.
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year.
Totally relate. Had the same experience with something from my childhood called Jello 1-2-3. Bought it three years ago when I found it on a shelf after thinking about it for years. Bought a blender just so I could make it. It was terrible. Why do I remember it as being so good? In my case I think it was because we made it as a family and ate it as a family. It was the family I liked, not the flavor.
ReplyDeleteI usually don't have food things like this (things taste delicious to me most of the time!), but sin in my life happens a lot like this. Something seems so great, you give in, then feel like crap because it wasn't that awesome and took me farther from God. ick!
ReplyDelete